Patience in Expectancy

 This post first appeared on the Sisters Forward Facebook page. 

It feels like a lot of life is waiting. We're waiting for the next school break. For the next paycheck. Waiting for the next opportunity of work and ministry. We might be waiting for test results, for kids to get to the next stage of life.  Waiting and hoping for a friend's diagnosis to resolve into healing. Life is just a great big waiting game. 

Waiting can be so very frustrating. It feels like inaction and thus, a waste. Waiting seems like a place of vulnerability and being unsafe. Waiting means we don't know or have the knowledge to proceed. We are not able to depend on our own logic or reasoning to get out of the situation we are in. When we are not sure how to proceed, we can feel lonely and afraid. 

I am so thankful that this is not where we have to stay when we have the Holy Spirit as our Helper. Second Peter 3:8 reminds us that "...with the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and that a thousand years is like a day." We do not need to rush through our waiting. We revel in the knowledge that God's timetable is much slower than our own. It is in this waiting that we learn dependence on God. We realize our own finiteness and praise Jesus that He is infinite. While the waiting is hard, we know that the yoke of Christ is easy and His burden is light. Because Jesus does not give us the burden of waiting to handle on our own. We are imbued with the strength of the Holy Spirit to endure the seasons of waiting. 

My dear sisters, let the words of John 13:7 be both our reminder and our encouragement. That though we do not know what God is doing in our lives currently, later we will understand. When we get to Heaven and have the perspective of Jesus to look back at the journey we have taken, then we may have the full understanding of what God was doing. Then the expectancy and burden of waiting we have carried with us will be fulfilled by our loving Father. 

The Gift

 When my kids were young, as in two to five year old, I was creative with when I would go grocery shopping. I would go in the wee hours of the morning, sometimes at 10 o'clock at night with girlfriends. I would go during a lunch hour, or after work. I took just one child with me. Or I sent the list to my husband and have him pick up groceries on his way home from work.  I usually would just take the youngest and let her shine happy rainbows to all the other customers.

Often, grocery shopping is a thankless task. Something to be done quickly and efficiently. That is not something that a toddler or preschooler understands. At the grocery store, there is a brand new array of sights to see and people to meet. Rather than hurry thru the task and beat down that curiosity as I tried to do with the older two, when I thought efficiency mattered more than relationships, I learned to slow down and embrace our meandering pace thru the store. When I did that, it would create margin in our lives. Margin that allowed us to meet new people in the aisles of the store. Or even the greeter at the front entrance.  

Because I have the opportunity to craft our day as we will, I have the opportunity to create space. I have the gift of time. That gift can be shared with others. Like the greeter at our local box store. She is a delightful retired kindergarten teacher who smiles brightly at every customer. We also met the cat lady who was recently divorced. She was having a bad day and our fifteen minute conversation gave her a bright spot in her lonely evening. Or countless other random conversations where I have been able to offer hope and encouragement to others because I was willing to slow down the pace of life. Not because I naturally move slowly, but because I was shown how to be slow by the gift of my little ones. 

You have those same opportunities. To slow down and create space for even strangers. We get so wrapped up in our daily habits and chores, that we often forget that we are called to "Go out into all the world and make disciples of the nations." like it tells us in Matthew 28:19-20. This doesn't have to be done from a pulpit or by the missionary you heard last Sunday. In fact, a large part of going into all the world is our job. When we remember that we are all called a part of the royal priest hood like Hebrews tells us, we can each do our part to build God's kingdom. One grocery store conversation at a time. 

So choose to take it easy. Try to let go of the list and embrace what may come. It feels weird and awkward, but it's worth it. 

Honesty with God

     The story of Genesis is a lot of set-up. It starts with the creation story and then goes on into birth of God's chosen people, the Israelites. The origin of the Israelites begins with Abraham and Sarah. Abraham is given a name-change and a promise. Sarah is as well. The difference is their reactions. 

    We can see from reading our Bibles, or spending time in conversation with other believers, that God's time-line looks very different than our own. This can create panic in our human hearts because we have a subconscious understanding that our time on earth is finite. While God is infinite. You can see where the disparity lies. Sarah and Abraham had doubts. Sarah in particular was bitter in her situation. It wasn't easy being a barren woman married to a man promised to be the start of a nation. You and I can put ourselves in Sarah's shoes. Sarah knew what God had said, but it was having a hard time taking root in her spirit. 

    Chapter eighteen of Genesis shows us that Abraham and Sarah had three visitors come to their homestead. These were angels sent to confirm to Abraham and Sarah that the fulfilment of the promise was here. As they are talking, Sarah is in the tent preparing some refreshments. Sarah bitterly laughs at the pronouncement from the angels. The exchange goes like this: 

 "So Sarah laughed to herself as she thought, “After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?” Then the Lord said to Abraham, “Why did Sarah laugh and say, ‘Will I really have a child, now that I am old?’ Is anything too hard for the Lord? I will return to you at the appointed time next year, and Sarah will have a son.” Sarah was afraid, so she lied and said, “I did not laugh." But he said, “Yes, you did laugh.” (Genesis 18:12-15, NIV)

    Sarah's first instinct is to lie about her laughter. She wants to cover up the fact that she is untrusting of God's promise for her. We do the same thing. When life gets to the point that the promises of God are harder to believe than the doubts that He is faithful, we cover up those doubts. When we have been in a season of waiting that has felt longer than our endurance can take, we cover up our despair and longing for fulfillment. At some point in church tradition we stopped being honest about our feelings with God and other believers. 

    My friends, this is not healthy discipleship. Throughout Scripture we are shown a great variety of emotions and feelings. All of the pillars of our Christian faith struggled with their emotions. Sarah doubted, Gideon was afraid of his families reaction, David prayed for vengeance on his enemies, Jeremiah wept, Mary felt unworthy, Jesus begged for the Cross to be taken from Him, Paul longed for a release from the shackles of prison, and we continue to experience all of those feelings still. We all have feelings, it is not a sin to experience them. We just need to know where to pour them out so they do not fester in our souls. Psalm chapter six shows us where to start: 

"I am worn out from my groaning. All night long I flood my bed with weeping  and drench my couch with tears. My eyes grow weak with sorrow; they fail because of all my foes. Away from me, all you who do evil, for the Lord has heard my weeping. The Lord has heard my cry for mercy; the Lord accepts my prayer." (Psalm 6:6-9, NIV)

Where do you want to go?

 

 The story of Abram, or Abraham as he became known, is one of the most well-known stories in the Bible. It is the story of a man who was given the promise that his children would become a great nation. His offspring were to be the chosen people of God. This promise and Abraham's belief in it was accredited to Abraham as righteousness. 

Before the business of building a nation began, however, Abram still had to live life in the day to day. He still had to work tending the sheep and make sure his family could eat. Abram had a nephew named Lot he was helping as well. Abram and Lot became so successful with their herds of sheep, that they needed to separate so the flocks and shepherds could continue growing. Abram knows that he will one day inherit a land called Canaan. It might be in the future, but it will come. Lot wasn't given any such promise, so his eye is on the immediate. The two men come to a fork in the road. There, each man is drawn to a homeland. Abram gives lot the choice to go east or west. Lot sees a a beautiful plateau of grass and streams. It's close to cities that would be an easy access for trade with people. The other land is further out. More rocky than flat. Lot chooses what most of us would, the flatland close to town. It makes sense. Lot moves to the area near Sodom and Gomorrah, Abram goes into the land of Canaan. Later, each man ends up in very different places. Lot ends up desperately trying to save himself and his family from destruction, having compromised the lesson he had learned from Abram earlier in life. Abram remains a man of faith. Quietly working among his sheep in the land of Canaan. Seeing how the Lord continues to bless Abram and his flocks of both sheep and people. 

We also have a choice. A choice between a future promised land or the more immediate gratification of a greener pasture now. Most of the time, we are like Lot. Choosing the option that is most advantageous to ourselves. Not always in a directly selfish or self-promotional way, more in a this works best for me and my family way. It's not necessarily wrong, but it's not necessarily guided by God' either. When we choose to go the route that's most convenient, we sometimes miss the lesson of dependence on God that draws us closer to Him. 

If we chose like Abram to live a life that was based in faith rather than what we can understand, our lives might have a lot more questions. That is scary as all get out. We also know that God tells us not to fear at least 365 times in His word. Living a life of dependence on God allows us to grow in our faith in Him and surrender our striving to live life on our own. 

Abram and Lot each came to very different ends. Lot ended up dying in a cave with his two daughters. Abram did indeed go on to become the father of many nations. Each man chose his path. Each one was influenced by the land he chose to live in. What choice are you making? Who will you let influence you?

While we can't look into the future to know where our first steps might lead us, we can know that living a life of faith and obedience will always lead us to the kingdom of God. 

Anonymity

Awhile ago, I took my car in for an oil change. As I was going in, another lady was leaving the store. We had some features in common like hair color and the number of kids in tow. When I came up to the counter, the attendant asked me what else I needed. As in, weren’t you just here? Then he realized that I was in fact someone else. A tiny, ok a large, part of my pride wanted to point out the various differences between myself and the previous customer but I kept my ego in check and politely smiled instead.

I was thinking about the mistaken identity. Why did that bother me? I think it was because every part of my self, that is my sinful nature, wants so badly to be noticed for me. In fact, a huge part of our culture is all about being noticed, recognized or even influential. As Christ followers, our worth is not found in the opinion of others. It's not even found if strangers notice us. The only one who needs to see us is our Father in heaven. He sees us so intimately that Luke 12:7 says "He knows the number of hairs on our heads." Psalm 139:13-18 talks specifically how God knew us before we were even born. God knows the plans and dreams you have in your heart. Trust that one day, God will fulfill the dreams He has laid out for us. 

The next time that a barista gets your name wrong or the store greeter completely disregards you, I want you to have these words; “It’s ok that they mistook me or ignored me. I’m not here to be noticed, I am here so others will notice Christ in me.” Perhaps it’s not your turn to stand out. Maybe it will never be your turn.  Keep on serving Jesus, and one day you will be rewarded with a crown of glory in heaven. Because you are seen by our King. That is our hope and eternal reward.  I hope this encourages you! Let me know if it does. 

Are you stuck?

 There are times in life where we feel stuck. It's not always a situation we are aware of. Most of the time we have fallen into habits or routines that have led us down a road we don't know how to branch off of.

We end up stuck in a moment that keeps us hostage. It may have been grief over a lost loved one. We may be waiting for the job that will finally allow us to break out of poverty. We might be waiting for a relationship progress from dating to engagement. Or engagement to marriage. We might still be waiting for a marriage to feel like a family with the addition of children. Each of us is always waiting for the next thing. Or for the situation we are in to end. We find ourselves in the not so great place of wanting to move on, but not sure how to do just that. 

I don't know about you, but my first reaction is to be like the character Saka from Avatar: The Last Airbender: 

via GIPHY

I want to do whatever it takes not to stay where I am. So I hack at the situation until I'm exhausted. Yet still unable to move forward. Instead of leaning toward God and asking "What can I learn here?" I keep trying to find solutions out of the tough place. Then, like in quicksand, I become more and more overwhelmed with whatever I'm trying to run out from. I don't want to deal with the difficulty of remaining still. When we stop trying to fix our problems on our own, we get to experience the full power of our Rescuer. 

Inaction often feels like failure. Like we are not doing enough. In a world that tells us to keep our heads down and keep moving, to sit still is revolutionary. That is exactly what our Lord calls us to do. When we are mired in the quicksand of life, it is there we must remain still. In stillness, we have space to remember what God has done for us and others. Psalm 102:18 says "Let this be written for a future generation, that a people not yet created may praise the Lord."

Have you ever thought about that? That what you are going through is to help someone else on their journey? Someone who may not even be born. Maybe when we are stuck, we are to take time to remember what God has already done in our lives. Resting on that to give us the endurance to persevere

in the waiting. So we might encourage others on their journey. If we believe Romans 8:28, that God does indeed work all things for the good of those who love Him, than we can also believe that nothing we go through is in vain. Even when it feels like we are stuck. 

The waiting brings stillness, it's in the stillness that we can know God better. 

In whom do you trust?

 When I was a young girl under the age of ten, I realized I could not trust others. My belief that people had mostly good intentions was shattered. It's something that still makes me question the motivations of both strangers and those closest to me to this day. Because when trust in others is shattered at a young age, that young person grows up to become a very skeptical woman. Leaving me to mostly look like this:

via GIPHY

However, to walk through life with a big slab of doubt on my shoulder is also very contradictory to how I (and we) are called to live as believers in Jesus. Part of being among the body of believers is being able to trust one another with our burdens. I am to share my troubles and confess my sins to other believers. I am to rely on God to take care of me. So are you! How do we do that when, from an early age, trust had been broken? 

We turn to the pages of Scripture. Specifically, the Psalms. Psalm 91:2 says, "I will say of the Lord, 'He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust". When I have been let down by people, I rely

on God. When I am not sure how to trust humans, I begin by trusting God. Knowing that I have the power of Jesus to rely on, is an excellent starting point for learning how to trust again. Because it was humans that broke my trust first, I need to learn from the One who is most trustworthy. 

When I begin to doubt God's love and faithfulness, I remember Psalm 89:2 which tells me, "I will declare that your love stands firm forever, that you have established your faithfulness in heaven itself." Feelings will always pull us back towards being skeptical and full of doubt. We need a new set of words to remind us what is true.