Friday, June 24, 2016

Dear Me

I mentioned last week that I am going thru Brene' Brown's book The Gifts of Imperfection. The second chapter is about worth and belonging. As a way to foster the ideas of worth and belonging, we must practice self-care. I must also be willing to go back and work thru the hurts and pain in my early days to come to a more honest version of who I am to be.  

As an exercise in being compassionate with myself, I am writing a letter to my younger self to tell her a few things. 

Dear younger me: 

I have been thinking lately I needed to write you a letter. I've realized there are things you probably needed that you didn't know how to get as a young girl and woman. This is my way to tell you now that I love you. 

To my little girl self I want to say it's ok to be shy. It's alright to prefer books to people. I'm sorry I accepted others ideas of who we should be. I'm sorry for shutting you away in a closet because I was ashamed of what happened to us. I want to tell you now that I love and accept who you are and want to cultivate our relationship. 

To my teenage self: Whew! We made it thru junior high and high school! I wanted to let you know a few things from a few years out. Just because we are loud and fun on the outside does not mean we get to ignore the turmoil within. Embrace your emotions and work thru them. We didn't have to be different with different people groups. Guys aren't the answer to fulfillment. I wish we could have let go of our legalistic tendencies and loved people for who they were. I want you to know that you get to a place of freedom. That we learn to love ourselves and others. You are worthy of love and belonging.

To my young mom self: You are enough! Your kids are great. You are the best choice of a mom for your kids. God knew what he was doing when He made you their mom. It's ok to reach out for help. It's also ok to ask for alone time. You, beautiful mama, are worthy. There are others coming to be a part of your tribe. Your husband loves you and isn't your enemy. You will never do enough to be loved. Because you are loved already for who you are. 

Let's give ourselves some compassion and grace. Self care is not selfish, it's a biological need. Embrace YOU today. 

Katie at 36

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