Friday, June 30, 2017

Moving Forward

    We have had a lot of change in our families life over the last few years. We've moved. Families have been rearranged. Friends have made new choices that we are adjusting to. Our kids have been in three schools in the last three years. It's been a little crazy.

   Some of us do well with the change. We thrive in it. A new challenge and new opportunities means a new chance to discover things previously unknown. It's an adventure. Others in our little brood aren't so enthusiastic. In fact, you could say they are down right antagonistic about the move.

     So how do we handle that? 

     I'ld like to say it's with a lot of grace and compassion. But that's not always the case. When I'm the one that's excited and the kids are still longing for what was, I can get impatient. When the longers want to romanticize what was, I am quick with the retaliation of what my perceived reality was.
    It's my tendency to want to rush a grieving process. Because I don't want to sit in what was or ruminate for ever and how things could have been. I'm more of a hear and now kind of person. Let's try to find the good about what's happening. I often say to my three not so littles that we should focus on something good about what we are doing instead of dwelling on all the bad about what's going on. 

Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. 

     I'm not advocating we all brush our issues under the rug and not deal with them, that's a whole other thing. I am saying that sometimes we, I, others, get so wrapped up on how things used to be, we miss out on what is going on right in front of us. Sometimes the rose-colored rear view distracts from the day-bright beauty of the present. 

     We try to keep in touch with those that were left in our old towns. We keep pursuing relationships that have altered in some way. We also get involved with the community we are in. So that our family can find what is worth celebrating in our new place. 

     Change is hard, it needs to be processed. But let's not miss on the hear and now because we are stuck in the past. 


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