Friends. Friendship, how do we attain that? I know others write about this and I am going to bring in some thoughts that I have heard over the years. I'll also tell you why I found friends to be so important.
Let's begin by being clear on what a friend is. It's not someone that Facebook suggests to you because you might share an acquaintance with some one. Those are acquaintances. They are people you might meet at a baby shower for the shared friend. They are not people you would call at the last minute to watch your children. A friend, a true friend, is someone you spend time with. Face to face. Not just face to Facebook.
Friends can be tricky, everyone has an opinion on how you should be a friend. Some people like to have a conversation over the phone with friends every few days, others can go months without seeing someone but than meet up and share an experience together and everything seems the same. Other people like to give and receive from their friends. Friends come in all shapes and sizes. Even social media has it's benefits for connecting and growing relationships between people.
Well, gee Ms. Katie, that's great. But how do I make friends? This is going to be life changing, wait for it... wait for it..... leave your house. Whether physically leaving your home, or joining a community that is on-line, we have the capacity to meet other people.
I am an outgoing person. I like to be with people. I talk to strangers at the super market and park. I give advice to people at Redbox. At restaurants. Really anytime I over hear or see some one deliberating over a choice I will chime in. I regularly give my email and phone number to other moms I meet at play places or the park. It's mortifying to all the introverts in my family.
That wasn't always the case. I've always been outgoing, but I used to hold back from extending myself to strangers. Because it can be weird or awkward. I am sure there are people I have given my opinion to that would have preferred I just kept my mouth shut about what they should have for lunch. Or maybe they didn't want to know what I thought about their movie choice. I have been told to mind my own business enough times that I'm more cautious about where I'll weigh in on other people's lives.
It is scary and intimidating to introduce yourself to others. It's so much easier to just ignore the other mom at the play place or the library that has a child close in age to yours. We have things to do and places to be. We can duck our heads into our smart phones and never make eye contact with a stranger again. I get that. What are we missing when we don't look up from our devices? What help could God be providing in a friend we haven't met yet?
Friendships enrich our lives. It's been proven that we live longer and healthier lives with friends. We need people to hang out with. Facebook is not enough. Instagram, Snapchat and whatever other social media outlets are out there are not enough. We miss out on something when we don't share our lives with those outside our family circle. The Bible is pretty clear about the importance of friendship. Proverbs 27:9 says that "A sweet friendship refreshes the soul". Ecclesiastes 4:9-10 says that "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls one can help the other up, But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them". These verses aren't about gathering a group around you for how they can help you work, they mean that we need community to help us thrive as individuals.
I once heard a speaker share that there are two kinds of people in the world. One has the mentality of wanting to be recognized, a hear I am kind of person. The other is a there you are kind of person. As believers in Christ it's our job to reach out to the lost. The broken. The wall-flower who hasn't blossomed yet. We don't all have to be loud and obvious in our approach to others, but we do have to take the first step. Let's join together and be the kind of people that say, "there you are!" with a smile.
No comments:
Post a Comment